Motherhood.

Parenting is challenging. It's a blessing, but it also comes with many hurdles. Today, I want to be completely honest. I often struggle with parenting. I've read all the books and listened to numerous podcasts, but at the end of the day, I still lie in bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering if I will ever get it right, especially as a mom.

My aunt was the best example of a mom for me. She's my role model, and I hope I am lucky enough to be half the person she is one day. She's always been constant in her love and support for me. I was not an easy kid when I was young; let me tell you, the attitude I had could rival a teenager. And the tantrums? Good luck to everyone who had to deal with those with me. I was the kid bolting out the front door and running down the street into the neighborhood instead of sitting in time-out. Yeah, hope you were up for a jog that day. Even though I was extremely difficult as a little kid, she still got through to me. I feel incredibly blessed to have her in my life. I know she is a good mom, but I don't know what motherhood looked like for her on a daily basis. Did she struggle to keep her temper when no one was listening? Did she feel guilty no matter what decisions she made? How did she get her kids to listen? What was the correct response to that hard situation? Did she wonder if she was getting it right? While I can certainly ask her those questions, I still wonder what her responses looked like in those moments. What does a mother navigating the day-to-day life of parenthood look like?

We all have different ideas about parenting, and our childhood experiences influence how we approach parenting when it's our turn. I grew up with just my dad, and we had some great adventures together. I'm incredibly close to my dad, and I feel blessed to have such a strong bond with him. I loved being a daddy's girl and enjoyed being a bit of a tomboy. From my dad, I learned valuable skills like how to patch a hole in the drywall and build a manger for a Christmas play with only a hammer, some nails, and wood. By age 5, I could probably name every type of tool there is. The biggest thing I learned from my dad was the importance of hard work, perseverance, and how to be resilient. These skills have been invaluable throughout my life. However, not having a mom around was different. My dad did his best with "mom" things, from attempting to curl my hair (it didn't go well, sorry, Dad!) to being the perfect Girl Scout dad and always being there for me. But men and women handle things differently, including emotions. Navigating motherhood without a guide has often left me feeling lost at sea. Nevertheless, I am still picking up that paddle and trying to find my way.

Our motherhood journeys are all unique. We come from different backgrounds and are working hard to give our children the best future. We often forget to be patient with ourselves and acknowledge the amazing job we are doing. Seeing the joy and love in our children's eyes is incredibly fulfilling. Watching them grow and reach every milestone is an adventure filled with both excitement and sadness as time flies by. I try to remind myself that these days are precious, and we won't get them back. Despite the challenges, these days are the best. We are learning alongside our children, and though it can be hard and we may doubt ourselves, it's important to remember that our children look at us with unwavering confidence. We are doing our best.

I wanted to write this blog post for a few different reasons. First, I wanted you to really see me. I may share ideas on handling anxiety and parenting, as well as things that help kids with their own emotions and other experiences, on the blog. But the biggest thing I want you to remember is that I am not perfect. I don't always get it right. Parenting is hard, and while I do my best to use the tools I have found and keep a positive perspective, sometimes I falter. That's being human, and that's absolutely okay. That brings me to my second reason. I hope that by sharing these things with you, you can remember to go easy on yourself. None of us have to be the "perfect" parent. We will get it wrong sometimes. If we always got it right, then what would our children learn? What would we learn? Perfection is overrated. Give yourself grace. I know I am trying to do the same.

You've got this, Mama.

Warmest wishes, Christy